Pizza My Heart
Posted on April 13, 2017
Some Friday nights are wild and crazy, some Friday nights you are the uncomfortable third wheel on a pizza date.
After having been in bed for half a week, coughing, sweating, missing my Mum who would peel me grapefruits and bring me tea – being sick is about ten times as worse when you’re alone with nothing but a slow WiFi-connection and some expired cream cheese to keep you company – I decided to venture out on Friday to the pizza place down the street. It may not be the health food a recovering body needs, but everybody knows pizza is basically just a transformed tomato salad with croutons, so it should be fine. To get to the pizza place however, there was one obstacle (besides putting on pants) and that was my friends gathering in the kitchen to go out. They reckoned as I could go out for pizza, I could go out full stop. I reckoned no and made a run for it.
Some Friday nights you look like Kim Kardashian at PFW, some Friday nights you look like horse shit.
Can you guess which one I was looking like on my way to the pizza place? Carefully dodging beautifully dressed people, couples walking hand in hand and gorgeous drag queens – I live near Oxford Street after all – I made my way into the pizza place. A small counter was placed at the window and I decided I might as well eat there; it would give me the chance to eat in silence and to avoid having to share with my friends currently occupying the kitchen (as bitchy as that sounds, I’m a total Joey, sorry not sorry). Unfortunately, a lovely couple decided to eat in as well, and all of a sudden I was sitting at this narrow counter with two other people, instantly becoming the awkward third wheel on their pizza date. Thankfully, I can finish a slice of pizza faster than Bolt can finish a 100m race, so a few minutes later I was back outside, slightly sad, slightly nauseated, but also pretty happy, because pizza.
Some Friday nights you are a smoking hot, independent woman who don’t need no man, some Friday nights you’re a miserable hag who is bound to share her life with Ben and/or Jerry.
For me it was a Friday night shared with an unknown couple and cold medicine, but you get the gist. When you feel sick, miserable and alone, the last thing you need is to look like horse shit inhaling a slice of pizza next to a happy couple. Ninety percent of the time, I’ll be a Bad Bitch Who Don’t Need No Man, but sometimes, even a BBWDNNM gets a bit lonely. Even if you’re not a very touchy-feely person, sometimes all you need is a good hug, a pat on the back and a reassuring ‘everything will be alright’. I have never really envied my friends who are in long-term relationships at our age – even if it works perfectly for them and they are all glowing and happy, it’s not for me – but sometimes it would be nice to know there’s something else waiting for you at home but aforementioned slow WiFi-connection and expired cream cheese. Safe to say I felt pretty miserable that day (okay, week), but I’m happy to tell you I’m back to feeling just pretty. This BBWDNNM bought a gorgeous golden velvet slip-on dress at Topshop and is ready to take on the world.